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Sun, Sep 19, 2021
Read time: 9 min.
You know what’s a terrible place to go during a global pandemic?
Florida.
On an unrelated note, I was recently having a conversation with a
Floridian–we’ll call her Flo, to protect her privacy–and the subject of sharks
came up.
I can’t remember exactly how the conversation went, since–for reaso...
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Sun, Aug 29, 2021
Read time: 8 min.
Security questions are terrible.
I mean, we can start with the obvious–you’re in the middle of signing up for
some service that you were probably hoping to use now, when suddenly you’re
prompted to fill out a pop quiz about yourself, and the “right” answer isn’t
necessarily the one that’s accurate–...
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Tue, Jul 27, 2021
Read time: 5 min.
Regrettably, I need to backpedal from my last post: Ted Cruz does not, in fact,
resemble the mangled corpse of a deep-sea fish. Physically, I mean. Obviously if
we’re talking personality-wise, they’re virtually identical.
Please, be honest with yourself.
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Tue, Jun 15, 2021
Read time: 1 min.
I would like to take a moment to discuss the blobfish, or the Psychrolutes
marcidus.
The most famous photo of Mr. Blobby dates back to 2003, and has been meme-ified
ever since thanks to the unique aesthetic that won it “World’s Ugliest Animal”
in 2013, and occasionally due to a supposed passing r...
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Sun, May 23, 2021
Read time: 13 min.
I know that ever since my most recent post, you’ve all been on the edge of your
seats, so I’ll ease your concerns now: I’ve gotten my second dose. There’s been
a lot of talk about how awful the side effects are for the second shot, so when
I went in this past Monday, I was ready to get laid out for ...
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Sun, Apr 18, 2021
Read time: 3 min.
Because why not start out with a terrible pun?
Today I took my first hit of the Pfizer vaccine.
It was a well-run operation, I have to say. I showed up at the hospital and
followed the trail of prominent “Vaccine Clinic” signs that they’d set out so
that the process wouldn’t get held up by hapless...
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Sun, Feb 14, 2021
Read time: 5 min.
Long, long ago, when I set up this website, I decided to use a Content
Management System (CMS) called Drupal. A CMS, if you’re not aware, is a type of
software that people who can’t be bothered to learn HTML use to post their
stupid thoughts on the Internet.
Drupal made it easy enough to post my st...
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Mon, Dec 24, 2018
Read time: 15 min.
I’m now coming up on the first Christmas where my son has been cognizant enough
to give a damn, and so lately we’ve been reading that beloved Christmas classic,
How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
This is what got me thinking about the Grinch again, and, as any of my regular
readers know, it’s when I s...
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Fri, Jun 08, 2018
Read time: 6 min.
Despite the infrequency with which I post new blogs–and I’ll be the first to
admit that I’m a terrible person who misses every writing deadline that he sets
–it’s not often that it takes nearly half a year to write a single post that
I’ve already started.
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Tue, Oct 31, 2017
Read time: 5 min.
I’ve previously discussed my wife’s love of Hallmark Channel Christmas movies.
Incidentally, to those who have read this blog and relied on it for
investigative research purposes, I’d like to apologize and issue a minor
correction.
